Balance? What does that mean to you? My definition of balance has changed quite a bit over the years. In elementary school, my balance consisted of playing with friends, riding our bikes around the neighborhood, getting my Velcro stars on the wall at school each week and putting my parents on the spot about school night sleepovers. Pretty simple.
Middle school was a bit of a change. I switched schools and my competitive travel soccer schedule made it so I was up and down the highways of North Carolina on the weekends. I was primarily focused on getting my parents to drive me to the movies and not getting caught chewing gum or playing Tomb Raider during class. Then something a little more serious happened- my parents got divorced.
In high school things got a little more real. Balancing social life, school work, college plans and SAT prep, who asked who to prom in the most outrageous way, Friday night soccer games and what house party I would be going to after. These were probably some of my hardest years for me dealing with hating who I saw in the mirror. I remember getting up every day, frying my hair with a straightener and breaking down into tears because it never looked how I wanted. I didn’t love myself and I was not proud of the person I was. It reflected in my overall behavior. I had absolutely no priorities or goals so, high school was pretty imbalanced to say the least.
Then to college- a bit of a revolution. A change of scenery from a small retirement golf community to the mountains of North Carolina. School work, making new friends, “getting involved”, exercise, eating healthy, and well, surviving college. During these years I was able to find my independence and at least get a start on knowing myself and how to balance all of my different responsibilities. I started to recognize my capabilities and see a future for myself and that was exciting. I traveled a lot and my perception of life was most definitely broadened. I experienced times of imbalance but things were much, much better than the 4 years prior.
Now that I’m a little more than a year out of college, balance has a much deeper meaning to me. It doesn’t just mean being capable of balancing all of the different aspects of my life. Instead it means keeping my inner peace while balancing what is truly important to me in life. Before, I thought balance meant having the ability to juggle multiple things no matter how much stress I felt or how much I struggled. I used to think the more I had on my plate, the more balanced I would be. I found that this put a huge weight on my shoulders and left me completely emotionally and physically unstable. People would say, “You have it all together” and I would look at them and think, “Wow, I’ve done a great job at LOOKING like I’m balanced, I must be balanced! GOAL REACHED!” I quickly realized that looking like you lead a balanced lifestyle is much different than actually leading one.
This year when I moved to Florida I didn’t follow my heart. I stayed in certain situations that made me feel incredibly imbalanced. Finally, I was like “NEWSFLASH TO SELF: SOMETHING ISN’T RIGHT.” For details on that situation check out my last post. My point is, when something doesn’t feel right, when it doesn’t add a healthy balance to your life it’s not right. Once you get rid of the things that don’t serve you, you will get that equilibrium and trust me, it’s an amazing feeling.
What I’ve realized is that balance is so much more than being capable of actually balancing a ton of responsibility on your plate. I’ve also realized that it’s definitely not maintaining the image that you have it all together all the time either. I now know that balance is a feeling. To feel balanced and at peace within while striving to do your best. Doing what you love. Feeling content with your everyday routine. Having energy when you wake up in the morning, realizing that life has its ups and downs and being okay with it. Finding joy in uncertainty and how much room you will always have to grow. It’s pretty great.
I think everyone is different in their capabilities and how they can balance their lifestyle. To me, exercise, a healthy diet, purpose, creating relationships, adventure, fun, sleep, time for my pup and myself are very important. I have finally arranged my life in a way that I feel compliments every aspect that I enjoy. It takes trial and error and periods of imbalance. So, please be kind to yourself. You’ll know when it’s right because you will feel it! You will feel even and at peace. You will be content.
This week, I really want to express to everyone that hard times are temporary. If you feel like things aren’t changing, if you feel stagnant, please realize that seasons come and go. Time passes and things change. It may not be instant and it may seem like you wake up waiting for a change every day but I promise it is coming. Target your balance first and the rest will come when you find YOUR equilibrium. Get RID of the things that don’t serve you- I repeat: GET RID OF THEM! If they don’t benefit you or your future in any way now, they never will.
Thank you guys so much for stopping by the blog this week! I hope my content is adding inspiration to your lives. I am so happy to be doing what I love again. I love you all, I love writing and I love the community this is creating! So happy to have my readers join me on this crazy amazing journey we call life!